This was always an article of faith for me: it might as well have never have happened if there isn’t a story to tell. As I’ve spent several years of my life essentially alone, this has caused me to feel a significant portion of my life is unreal and perhaps even in vain.
But this was when leaving a mark on the world was more important to me. It seems vainglorious now that the likelihood of me accomplishing some extraordinary feat (or perhaps some perfectly mundane but meaningful feat) recedes with every passing day. I still want to try to make a difference, but I’ve come to accept the possibility that I won’t. Well, like Gandhi said, whatever you do is insignificant, but it is important you do it.
Still, on these strange nights when I lie awake staring into the darkness, and my thoughts lead to memories of lost opportunities and chances I thought I had but probably never really did, I worry that there won’t be anyone to tell these little stupid stories about my life to, except the uncaring silence. So I guess trying to blog is at least an attempt–perhaps futile–to stave off my journey into annihilation by at least a little while. My small bulwark against oblivion. When all is said and done–and though I hope the end won’t be for a while yet–the only thing that ever has a chance at staying real are the words, the stories.
January 9th, 2012 at 01:51 AM Through Heaven's Eyes (Lyrics) A single thread in a tapestry though its color brightly shines can never see its purpose in the pattern of the grand design and the stone that sits up on the very top of the mountain's mighty face does it think that it's more important than the stones that forms the base So how can you see what your life is worth or where your value lies ohhhh, you can never see through the eyes of man you must look at your life look at your life through heaven's eyes lai-la-lai...through heaven's eyes(2X) A lake of gold in the desert sand is less than a cool fresh spring and to one lost sheep, a shepard boy is greater than the richest king should a man lose everything he owns has he truly lost his worth or is it the beginning of a new and brighter birth So how do you measure the worth of a man in wealth or strength or size in how much he gained or how much he gave the answer will come to ya to look at his life through heaven's eyes lai-la-lai...through heaven's eyes(2X) and that's why we share all we have with you though there's little to be found when all you've got is nothing there's lots to go around No life can escape being blown about by the winds of change and chance and though you never know all the steps you must learn to join the dance you must learn to join the dance lai-la-lai...through heaven's eyes(repeat until fade)